Ch4 - Page 17

Average Rating: 5 (1 votes) Rate this comic

<<First Mutton> Latest>>

Comments:

Jackarais 25th May 2016, 7:26 AM edit delete reply
Jackarais
Heh, I like this new guy.

JuicyGrey,

Well, I just sat down and read your comic--thank you for your recommendation. You've put a hell of a lot of work into this! I wish I had your foresight to draw my own comic in black and white....trust me, brother, color comics take WAY too long to draw. You'll finish your comic years before I ever finish mine. >_<

You've got great visuals....a strong grasp on values, and your environments are so unsettling, its like they suck you in to a different world. Like a vaccuum. The backgrounds are definitely my favourite part. I must confess that I find the story quite difficult to follow, so I can't comment on your writing. It's partially because your english isn't very strong yet, and that's totally OK--we all have to learn. I can more or less understand what everyone is saying, but it's pretty vague. I'm still not quite certain what the main character's goal is, or what her mission is, though she seems to be pretty good at getting shit done.

While everyone has very distinct defining features (hair, scars, eyes), since the body types are all the same, it's sometimes hard to tell who is who. I suppose that tends to happen when all the characters are in uniform. I do really enjoy that so many of your characters have scars, though. It's just something that would happen in the apocalypse, you know? :) A nice detail.

The only other thing I can think of is that all the comments from the dude characters about how women shouldn't be able to do this or that...by all means, include it, but it's said so many times that it is grating and repetitive, and therefore unnecessary.

Good read. I suggest working on clarity, so that everyone's goals and intentions are more clear to the reader. This can be shown with visuals as well as explained in text. You have a great set-up here, dialogue evenly split with action, and a super neato world. I'd love to see more of those incredible, dark environments--and to learn more about them, too.

Have a wonderful day,

Jack
JuicyGrey 28th May 2016, 4:21 AM edit delete reply
JuicyGrey
And now to answer this record sized comment...

Hehe, it is easy to work in black and white if you work with tradional tools. However it is not real reason. In early drafts four years ago I decided comic will look better without colours. Gives right mood. Still you may wrong about getting this finished before you. I work sloooowly...

Thankie, I really try get visuals just right. With writing I do confess it is little difficult. Aside from language (and not helping that I don't like if people talks same), it is also writing story. How write without each chapter becoming +60 pages? How informing reader, while making info part of story (can you make lack of info part of story too?). Yeah, lot of hard work ahead me...

With faces it helps I have figured out points which around I can build them. Bodies are much harder. Or perhaps it is really uniforms as you said? But thanks admiring of all those scars. You will see more scarred characters or more scars within character in future ^__^

David, what's all. Aside from general trouble maker, complaining about everything, not listening his superiors, chain smoking... Too fond of anything involving explosives... But believe or not, some readers admire him.

Still thankies for reading and feedbacks. Mean quite much for me. I am trying in future work with clarity. But, yeah, either way you are going see more these dark enviroments, learn about them and see how deep this irradiated rabbit hole really goes...

,